This Is Me: Hidden (Words on Body Image)

“I want to look at myself and feel an overwhelming sense of pride. I want to see more than what I am not, but I can’t.
” – J.H.Hipsher

Hidden by J.H.Hipsher

Hidden

I avoid mirrors. I move to the side so I’m not in the picture. I cringe when asked out to eat or invited to sit on friend’s furniture. That’s how it has been for the majority of my life. 

There are moments when I think about when I’m gone and realize that my children will only have a few images of me, but I still can’t bring myself to document my body. 

My body. 

The bag of flesh that carries me around and allows this magically fantastic life is the same thing I can’t bring myself to love. Most people don’t understand. They think of it as a refusal instead of an inability. 

I want to look at myself and feel an overwhelming sense of pride. I want to see more than what I am not, but I can’t. 

Instead, I do the only thing I can: I teach my children to love themselves–to see the value they hold, not because of what they look like, but because they are immensely worthy of greatness. 

I tell them the things I wish I had heard, the things I wish I had the strength to believe about myself. 


About the Author

J.H.Hipsher is a former college instructor turned homeschool mom. She is a graduate of the MFA writing program at Naropa University and lives in Illinois with her husband, three children, 2 dogs, and 2 cats.

Twitter: https://twitter.com/jharthipsher


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4 thoughts on “This Is Me: Hidden (Words on Body Image)

  1. I wish we talked more about this things, I’m going back and forward with accepting my body (not loving it) and it’s so hard. Thank you for sharing this story, it’s very important topic.

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  2. Aw this post touched me, I use to be so hard on myself and I never liked looking in the mirror. When I started my journey to self love one of the first things I did was look in the mirror and I cried, for many reasons. I cried because I was sad about how I let myself go and let the excuse of having 4 kids outweigh my motivation, I cried because I was so mean to myself… and then I got to a point one day I cried because I finally realize I am beautiful and I look so much like my Hawaiian people. Seeing yourself and accepting yourself for the first time is a beautiful gift. The only thing to do when you are unhappy is get to work on what will make you happy.

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  3. Thank you for sharing this post. My relationship with my body has been better. I try so hard to appreciate everything that it does but I can’t help but dislike the way it looks!

    Rosie

    Like

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